Tuesday, July 30, 2013

10 Things

1. There is a geese invasion going on right now.  I'm clearly not a bird expert, in fact I'm the exact opposite of that, but this doesn't seem like the right time for migration patterns, shouldn't they all be down south in Florida drinking pina coladas and playing shuffle board? Why I think geese are like retirees, I don't know, but let's not question the mechanics of my mind this early in the post. Wait, they migrate in the winter. I guess I have no idea what season it is anymore, however I don't believe that there is any right season for large birds to be in my yard. Let me look out my window (pause . . the sound of scurrying feet), there are 32 geese in my backyard right now. 32! And I don't trust a single one of them.

I was going to go run errands, but I don't think I could make it to my car, which is parked outside without going through a geese gauntlet. Hell to the no. Food and bills and putting gas in my car aren't that important.  I may be stuck in for awhile, SOS: PLEASE SEND TACOS. 

2. I'm a huge fan of apocalypse movies and TV shows. Let's scrap this world and start again! Hooray! But they are not just entertainment, they are educational. While watching an alien invasion saga a little bit ago, I realized that I may not have enough skills to make me valuable to a survivors group.   My skillz I have to offer would be: sharing inspirational sayings at moments of crisis (We will not go quietly into the night . . .FREEDOM), I can sing "I Will Survive" with gusto and I am pretty sure I can rock some Mad Max fashion. As amazing as these skills seem to me, I can see them equaling me becoming alien/zombie/crazed machines bait in certain situations. This weekend, in an attempt to gain more skills I built (term used loosely) a solar oven and tried to bake a pie in it. I may not be able to use a crossbow without sending myself to the ER, but hey guys--PIE. I lovingly made a peach-raspberry pie with a crumble top. And then everything went downhill.  I think the fruit was too juicy, the sun wasn't sunshiny enough, and well, it all turned out to be a fail. The solar oven got hot, but not hot enough for long enough and as the sun was going down, I gave up and threw the pie in the  real non solar oven.  It turned out OK, especially with a bowling ball size scoop of ice cream on top, but I felt a little defeated.  But not defeated enough to not try again. If the apocalypse can wait a little longer, I think I might be OK. 

3. I have learned a very hard lesson this week: you can't freeze and then thaw Brie cheese. Well, I guess technically you can, but it is gross. The moral of this sad story is that when you are in possession of Brie, especially if it is triple creme, you must stuff it ALL in your face as fast as possible. 

4.  My family has never had a dog and growing up, the only people in our CA neighborhood that had dogs where the drug dealers. And those dogs were mean and scary and caused me to walk a couple blocks out of my way on my way to school. So of course as a little tike I grew to believe that dogs = bad things like junkies and unneeded exercise. Since growing up a bit more, I have grown more and more OK with the canines, especially if they are types that I know I can out run. Recently I have pushed that line a little further and can now say I like dogs, or at least one dog, The General's German Pointer Mack:
At first I was super awkward because I realized that I don't even know how to pet a dog, so I just kinda flailed my arms in the general direction of the dog.  But Mack was pretty convinced that we were meant to be friends, so during a recent visit, he followed me around and alerted me (loudly) whenever a squirrel was in the area and that he was totally OK with table scraps and taught me the meaning of loyalty. What more could you want in a friend?

5. NPR is streaming The Avett Brothers Newport Folk Festival set. I can't. even. breathe. If you have never seem them live, you should put that on your bucket list and I'll go with you and promise not to scream in  your ear . . .too much. 

6.  Last Friday was a big day in my life, my very first trip to a Bass Pro Shop, and not just any shop, but the big flagship in Springfield, MO. It is so huge that I am pretty sure is has its own zip code and mayor. It was amazing and -what the heck- all at the same time. A couple things I discovered in hunter and gatherer land:  a good place to be hit on by farm boys is the turtle tank, some fish have anger management problems and I will never, ever, out live the story of that one time that I got stuck in my mummy bag sleeping bag on a camping trip. Also learned a lit bit later in the trip: the only remedy for bad Mexican food is good ice cream. 

7. It's tomato season! Which means around these parts, if you go a visiting your neighbors and friends you are required to leave with a bag of tomatoes. So many tomatoes, everywhere.  I've made tomato soup and fresh salsa and have reached my limit of BLT (it's possible) and popped the little ones like candy and/or pills. Hugs not drugs, unless those drugs are cherry tomatoes, then you can keep your hugs. 

8. I haven't been to a concert/live music show since the beginning of June and probably won't until September. This is make me crazy, jittery, and restless, which in turn has led me to try to teach the cat how to play the tambourine. It is going exactly how you think it would. 

9. I've been having very weird dreams lately. The other night, in a dream,  I was searching for the superb musician William Elliott Whitmore . . .so he could validate my parking. Now is the time to question the mechanics of my mind. 

10. It Just Gets Stranger is my new favorite blog about Snuggies and sometimes more serious things. Not that we should ever underestimate the seriousness of snuggies.  (Thanks Jen!)


  1. There was a banjo/spoons duo going hog wild in the subway in NYC while I was there over the weekend. It made me inordinately happy and it made me think of you. Not quite a 'concert' but the closest I'd had in quite some time as well. *sigh* if only we could spend our lives traveling around from venue to venue listening to all the live music our little hearts can handle! (that's what my heaven looks like, btw)

  2. YeeHaw! I'm so glad you liked the Stranger blog. One of my favorites too. It was a good weekend.

  3. Snuggies. OMG! I haven't laughed that hard in a long time. Thanks for spreading the Internet love.